As I said I think adoption is a noble & selfless act & I praise those who chose & continue to choose to do so, particularly when one adopts a child from a completely different culture or a child with disabilities- the work ahead of them is often very difficult to make sure they are meeting the needs of a child & these families also need the village to help them raise a child -the village that includes other families from the same culture & experience with disabilities. When I look at Zahara Jolie- Pitt , I ache for her for the fact that it is obvious that her adoptive family does not know how to handle her Ethiopian hair nor do they have someone in their life on a regular basis to teach them how to. This may sound trivial & ridiculous when the she is in a happy loving & wealthy home instead of in poverty in Ethiopia, but I have known adopted Black children with White parents who became traumatized adults because they had to live a life where they never felt beautiful because they were so different & their parents didn’t have the basic tools to know how to handle something as simplistic & complicated as their hair & found it a trivial thing to go out of their way to seek the help needed.

I was not at all speaking of children who have no family being given a home by any loving person regardless of race, religion, gender, sexual orientation or whatever- but I also emphasize “no family” not just no parents. In Africa the idea of family is extremely extended for a good reason. Many of my cousins live with my mother even though their parents are still alive & one lives a stones throw away, but my mother has the means & space to provide a better home & education for my cousins than their parents at this time. That is the duty of a family- to pick up the slack where needed in order to keep the family together & thriving as opposed to my aunts having to adopt out their children to strangers & not be able to see them again or to get the help & time needed to get themselves on their feet enough to be able to take care of their own children & to keep the legacy of family going. In the USA many of my friends & acquaintances find it so strange that I am constantly around & keep in touch with so many cousins, aunts, uncles & extended family, but that is what family is amongst Africa & her descendants & we should not lose that culture to a western culture where family is basically ur immediate family where one barely sees nor deals with their extended family. Every child deserves a loving home & the ability to share in family, so please don’t get me wrong about adoption & be open to see the bigger picture that I am speaking of.
Thanks-Aretha Amma Sarfo

PS
I do not put my name, not because I am hiding, but because all the posts on this site are written by me unless otherwise stated -so I don’t have the desire to plaster my name for the sake of making sure I get credit-but I see it causes some confusion. I will make sure to put my name so in the future people can address me by name & not feel like I am hiding behind my words.

I haven’t hidden my name; because I have nothing to be embarrassed about here. Perhaps you would like to post your own with your comments.

Doug Doran